Southern Musings

This is the day that I knew would come. I thought I would be ready. Boy was I ever wrong! This is the first day of my oldest son’s final year of high school. He left for school on time, wishing he could stay home. I wanted to cry and beg him not to go. Instead, I was the mom he needed me to be and told him to get his tail in that truck right away.

I can’t tell him how much I wanted to cry as he drove down the driveway. I can’t tell him how often I thought back about his first day of school and even the day he was born. He would not understand how much it hurts to watch your little boy growing into a young man.

He is a blessing. He works. He even plays sports. He tries hard to do things a man would. Sometimes he still wants to be the boy and play games. He sometimes is even a little difficult to get started on his day. Those are the times that I can remember that he is still and always will be my son.

While I was attending college to get my teaching degree, he would walk behind my chair and pat my back. He would look over my shoulder to see what I was working on and sometimes even comment. One day, he walked by as I was reading Love You, Forever. It caught his attention, so I read it to him.

Yes, he can read it himself. I just happen to believe that everyone can benefit from hearing a story read to them from time to time. I’m very glad that I took the time to read that book to him that day. From then on, when he saw me stressed, he would come to my side and quote the book to me.

Sons seem to have trouble letting their mothers know that they believe in them. For him, that was his way of letting me know that he believed in what I was trying to do. I made it through it, but not without the help of my husband and my sons.

This morning was a rather emotional time for me. I think I did a good job of not allowing my emotions to show through. I sure could have used hearing him quote that book this morning. When he told me that he did not need my money for lunch, it really sunk in that he was growing up. When he did not want to go to school, I had thought he was still being my little boy. He proved me wrong. He is my son that has grown into a young man. No, I’m not ready for this day. When it happens with my youngest son, I will be a basket case.

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